


After that kiss

by womanroaring



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Anxiety Disorder, Anxious!Yuuri, First Time, M/M, True Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-31
Updated: 2016-12-31
Packaged: 2018-09-13 16:15:54
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,020
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9131914
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/womanroaring/pseuds/womanroaring
Summary: Fluffy angsty goodness, because thank GOD Victor couldn't contain himself for a second longer, by the end of episode 7.Here's how I envisage their first proper sexual encounter, afterwards. Not TOO explicit and smutty, but I rated it "M" just in case.And yeah, Yuuri has an anxiety disorder and doubts everything. Thank GOD Victor is naturally smart and manipulative and is so good at dealing with it.Commenting is love.





	

_Well_ , thought Yuuri.

 _Victor_ would _know how to deal with a situation like this._

Sure, he’d never seen the man kiss anyone on live television before -- and he was pretty sure that he’d watched every single second of footage that Victor had ever been in -- but he certainly managed to save Yuuri from any embarrassment that his post-free-skate PDA might have caused. He smoothly interrupted the one journalist who tried to ask for more details about their personal relationship (none of the others dared after that) and, when approached by other skaters as they made their way back to the hotel, he had veered the conversation onto their own performance in a charming but determined sort of manner, at any point that it looked dangerous.

He kept Chris from coming anywhere near them with a mere look. Yuuri didn’t quite catch it, but Chris had in response merely made a motion with his hand that Yuuri thought may have meant “text me” but which also could have been an obscene gesture of some kind. Yuuri really wasn’t sure, because he was so high on adrenalin from the combination of his performance, the knowledge of placing well, and Victor’s kiss, that he wasn’t convinced he was experiencing reality in the same way as other humans right now.

That was when Victor had put his arm around him and steered him towards the lifts, saying, “What did you want to do now, Yuuri? You should probably have something to eat.”

“Actually, there’s an idea I wanted to swing past you,” Yuuri said. He left it at that, not wanting to say anything else as they got into the crowded lift.

“Of course,” Victor had said, blandly, and had made some chit chat about the performance of the women skaters that Yuuri barely registered.

Victor followed Yuuri into his room and pushed the door closed behind him. He looked at him for a moment, then said, lightly, “So, Yuuri, what was this idea you wanted to tell me about?”

Which was when Yuuri pushed him back against the (now closed) door, and kissed Victor with all the eros he had in him.

Victor responded with gusto, much to Yuuri’s relief as well as satisfaction, and when Yuuri broke away to start kissing his way down that gorgeous long neck of Victor’s, tugging at the knot of his tie to get it out of the way of his top buttons, Yuuri was even more relieved to hear him say, laughing breathily, “I _love_ this idea,” and start shrugging out of his coat. His jacket soon followed. He took a moment to drape them both across a nearby chair, so Yuuri whipped off his shoes and scooted backwards onto the bed.

“I like it even better now,” Victor added sweetly, following him onto it.

Yuuri would be lying if he said he’d never imagined this scenario. But the reality blew any of those anemic fantasies he’d had well out of the water. He couldn’t have pictured the yearning or the joy he saw in Victor’s face as they helped each other out of their clothing. Kissing Victor was like a dream. Having Victor’s hands on him was like a dream. That long, muscled body underneath him was like a _dream_.

He didn’t even realise he’d paused, staring down at Victor, spread beneath him, until Victor stopped too, tilting his head at him, questioningly.

“Beautiful,” he found himself saying, the longing completely bare in his voice. “You are _so_ **_beautiful_**.”

And then it hit him.

Like an actual blow to his chest.

He was such an idiot.

He was kidding himself.

This was all a mistake. He was mistaken. There was no possible way that he could get to do this, or to be in love with the real, actual, human being that was Victor Nikiforov -- with this stunningly beautiful genius of a man, sprawled out in front of him like a person -- not a poster from a magazine or an idol on a pedestal, but the real man, the man who was training him and coaching him and helping him so much -- and have him love him back.

This was some sort of game.

Or he had somehow tricked or deceived Victor into thinking he was worthy of him.

The pain to his chest doubled and he was about to open his mouth to say something to let Victor out of this -- tell Victor he didn’t have to go through with this just because he had been ridiculous enough to initiate it -- when Victor put his hand up to his face, drawing him back towards him.

“So are you,” Victor said. He was so close, he was exhaling the words into Yuuri like some sort of breath of life. “I wish that you could see yourself the way that I see you. You are made of starlight, Yuuri Katsuki. And," he added, in a lighter tone, pushing Yuuri onto his back, "you are entirely too overdressed for this situation,” he said, stripping him of his last item of clothing.

Yuuri didn’t have much time for panicking or self-doubt by that point. Victor was doing something quite wonderful with his mouth that Yuuri was fairly certain he had never experienced before and it was all very distracting.

Later -- much, much later -- Yuuri rugged up his courage enough to say the thing he felt that he needed to say.

“You know that -- that I’m in love with you.”

He couldn’t look at Victor as he said it.

Despite his pride.

And despite everything they’d been through together, up until this point.

“Good,” Victor had said mildly, putting his hand under his chin and tilting his face up just enough so that he could put a little kiss on the tip of his nose. “I’ve been in love with _you_ for ages.”

Yuuri had let that sink in for a second, and then hugged him fiercely in response.

As long as he let him -- as long as this could last -- he was going to be grateful for, and take advantage of, every second that he had with Victor.

 


End file.
